How to Keep a Clear Head During Divorce Proceedings

Going through a divorce is one of the most challenging experiences that most people will ever face in their lifetime. It is an emotionally draining process, and when agreements cannot be easily reached about the separation of assets and finances or child support arrangements, the situation can quickly become contentious.

It is essential to recognize that divorce is an intrinsically challenging process. However, it is important to keep a clear head despite the upheaval and make sound decisions so you can navigate the plethora of legal complexities in the most effective manner possible. 

Here are some of our top tips for staying composed and focused during your divorce proceedings so you can achieve a satisfactory outcome and a smoother transition into the next chapter of your life.

Seek professional support

Choose a family law attorney who understands what you are going through and is experienced in handling divorce cases. Your chosen lawyer should be compassionate and an excellent communicator so they can serve as an effective buffer between you and your soon-to-be-ex-spouse, reducing the opportunities for matters to become confrontational and easing the path to an amicable outcome.

When you choose an experienced and highly competent divorce attorney, you will benefit from peace of mind and the ability to seek their advice and guidance at any point during the process.

Another professional who can help you achieve a successful outcome is a mediator, who will support you and your ex in coming to a reasonable agreement by encouraging open lines of communication in a controlled environment. Along with your attorney, they will help you find common ground and reduce hostility, and they can potentially accelerate the divorce process.

Prioritize your emotional well-being

It is vital to acknowledge the emotions you are experiencing as you navigate the process of divorce. Trying to stifle them will not help, and it could even perpetuate the physical symptoms of stress, such as high blood pressure, diabetes and memory problems [1].

Instead, you should take the time you need to grieve the end of your relationship. Allow yourself to feel angry, guilty, betrayed and sad, but try not to dwell on these feelings. Acknowledge them, process them and then give yourself permission to move on from them. 

Speak to your family and friends about how you are feeling. If this is too overwhelming, there is no shame in seeking specialist emotional support from a therapist. Many people find that exercising, meditating or taking up a new hobby can also help them to achieve mental clarity during this difficult time.

Set realistic goals

It is entirely natural to want your divorce to be completed as quickly as possible so you can start rebuilding your life as a single person. However, you should expect even the most straightforward divorce to take at least three months to complete. [2]

Keep detailed records of all communications, agreements and financial documents that are related to the divorce. Being organized will demonstrate your commitment to a fair resolution and may reduce the timescale and your legal bills.

To help avoid disappointment, set realistic goals for both the timeline and outcome. Determine what the ideal outcome would be and what position you deem to be unacceptable; anything in between will be an acceptable outcome.

Manage your finances wisely

Financial worries are often cited as a significant stressor experienced during divorce proceedings, particularly for lower-earning individuals. It is crucial that you do not allow this stress to cloud your judgment. You must avoid making foolish spending decisions at this time as it may affect the court’s decisions related to alimony and child support payments. 

Carefully review your assets, debts and expenses with your divorce attorney, create a budget, and ensure that you will be able to maintain financial stability throughout the divorce process and after it concludes. You may decide to enlist the services of a financial advisor to help you make informed decisions about property division and wealth management.

Protect your children

Although you are going through an incredibly stressful time, keep in mind that the process can be challenging for your children as well. To help ease the transition for them, try to shield them from any conflict and do not involve them in adult issues. Encourage them to speak openly and honestly to you and continually reassure them of your love and that of their other parent 

Divorce proceedings can feel overwhelming, but you can benefit from the experience and support of Lewis & Matthews, P.C. family law attorneys in reaching a fair settlement that will pave the way to a brighter future. We can help with the legal process, in addition to providing guidance on nurturing your emotional and mental well-being.

Resources:

[1] https://www.verywellmind.com/the-dangers-of-bottling-up-our-emotions-5207825#:~:text=%E2%80%9CThere%20is%20some%20evidence%20that,effects%20can%20be%20memory%20difficulties.%E2%80%9D
[2] https://www.courts.state.co.us/userfiles/file/Self_Help/FAQ%27s/FAQ%27s%20and%20answers%20DIVORCE.pdf